Death and Hope

3 of my children, Ryan, Becky & Kara.

How do you share these two thoughts in a blog that would draw the reader into grasping both aspects of life? Why would I want to do this?

Today is the anniversary of my daughters death,  September 13, 2004.  This day is as fresh in my mind as if it had just happened.  She was 25 years old and loved life.

A major portion of her life was spent in hospitals, fighting to stay alive. I was with her when she died and in spite of the incredible medical technology and a great medical staff she left this world. Gone in the blink of an eye.

I am a mother who lost daughter.  I am not the only mother that has lost a child or even children.  There is a very large sorority that know of this sad experience.  Since the beginning of time losing a child has been a heartache shared by too many.  However, when one is touched by this type of tragedy our hearts should become tender and bonded with others who know this pain. Our sad hearts should reach out to others who need comfort.   Bitterness and anger can keep you trapped and the days of life you have left to live are wasted and most likely miserable.  God numbers each of our days and I intend to make each day count.   Memories of Kara remain close to my heart but walking life's paths with a desire to give others hope of a better life on this side of heaven, gives me delight and pleasure!

 I shared yesterday that the AIDS epidemic in Zambia takes 27% of the people. Typhoid, Malaria, Yellow Fever are just a few diseases that add to this AIDS issue.  It is very sad to think about the losses these people experience. These orphans in this photo are actually the fortunate ones, they have a place to stay, they are fed and they go to school. Death has stripped them of their families but because others care they are given a chance to live, grow and change their world. They are a rare minority. 

I live in the Midwestern part of the US.  I am often in very small towns and as you enter or exit these towns, cemeteries are a very distinct and an important part of the town.  Plots of land with markers for the people who have been buried there, can be seen from the two lane highway. More often than not a church is next to these places of rest.   Some cemeteries are several hundred years old. They are a documentation of a life, its beginning and its end.  These dates are important to those who are left behind. The tomb stone's indicate that this person was important to someone, they lived, they died and someone cared about them.  I find them to be places of reflection and peace. It is a place to grasp the brevity of life and to count my blessings.  It is a place for me to pray with out interruptions.

In Zambia I did not see any cemeteries.  Why would you care some would ask?  Of all the things to think about or to see on the trip, why would you even go down this path?  I am glad you asked.   Life is very important to me and my desire to be part of helping another live a healthy life, stems from having a loved one die so young and being with those who have suffered.   In her memory I choose to help give life. Soon I will share that 'hope' with you.


When a Zambian dies in the Western Provence they are buried almost immediately.  If a family can afford a simple wooden coffin their loved one rests there.  More times than not they are wrapped in a blanket and then in a straw mat before they are buried.  I shared that I did not see cemeteries, places marked with tomb stones of some sort.  However, I am guessing that in a village there is a place where those who die are buried. A place that one's earthly body is put to rest.  Monuments to ones life, as we know them, are most likely not to be found.  Poverty would limit this and death is so pervasive that permanent grave markers are not in abundance. I will find out more about this on my next trip, not because I want to focus on those who have died but to learn how people remember those loved ones who are no longer here. Those we love who have died, are not forgotten and should be remembered,  A loved one who has died is not forgotten.

Hands of Hope brings a hope of a better life in many forms.  Water is where it all begins.  Kara was a severe diabetic.  Water was like air to her, too many days of her life.  When her blood sugars were so very high her thirst could not be quenched.  I shared in my last post had she lived in the Western  Provence of Zambia she would have died by the age of 10.  Just the very dirty water would have caused her death.

 

Kara's life was short but she was a delight to those who knew her.  Her need for good, clean water made my Zambian experience all the more emotional as I was forced to see  how precious water is here. Placing myself as mother with a child who needed water more than food, in a country where water is a treasure and not a passing convenience, pushed me to  help these people to obtain a very basic need of life, clean pure water.  You WILL read more about this in blogs to come ;)  I promise. :) for me this message is a critical one to share.

Water is where all other help in a community begins.  Hands of Hope has plans to dig more wells. Money for 10 wells is needed before we can bring in the equipment to dig them.  Right now we have money for 2.   A well in this area costs $5000 to place in a village. An entire village is helped by one simple well. Diseases contracted by dirty water are drastically reduced and that is just the beginning.

 As I close this entry, I want you the reader to get yourself a glass of clean pure water.  Sip it, savor it and then thank the Lord for this blessing you have just tasted.  You won't get sick.  You did not have to get your water from the river pictured above, nor did you  have to walk 5+ miles to acquire it.  You did not have to carry a 40lb jug on your head back the 5+ miles to get it to your home. You just walked over to your sink, or your refrigerator and this life giving beverage was yours.  In the next 24 hours you will probably take a shower or a bath, this water too will be clean and plentiful.  I ask that you relish this blessing for it is rare in most of the world.  These children whose picture is just above reflect the joy we each should have as we list incredible blessings in our lives.  Water being one of the most important.

Filthy Water Cannot Be Washed - African Proverb

Health and Hope

Today's blog is a bit heavy.  It deals with life and death.  If these issues were not so prevalent in the Western Provence of Zambia, Hands of Hope would be in a different country.  There are many countries that need help.  Hands of Hope cannot be everywhere but since we are here we strive to make a difference in the lives of a few. Not just a difference today or this year but help these people become independent and move from their abject poverty.

This week marks the 8th anniversary of my daughter dying.  She was a beautiful 25 year old, who fought to live.  She was a diabetic that had issues many of which the top doctors in the US could not fix in the long run.  She had incredible medical care, state of the art hospitals, an incredible family support system and a strong faith in Jesus Christ.  She still died, as we all will some day.  Though I miss her so very much, I want to share the message of hope in helping those who have no one to care for them as Kara did. 

What Kara experienced is so far removed from the people in the Western Provence of Zambia.    Had she lived in Zambia she would have died by the age of 10. Hospitals as we know them do not exist.  Medical care as we know it, is impossible to access if you live in Zambia.  Even the poorest American has hope and access to medical help.  Of course there is no perfect system and nothing is free, someone is paying for care, here it is the tax system and government but here in the US help can be obtained.  You as an ordinary American are in a very, very good place. 

I am going to write two, maybe three blogs this week about health care, Kara, death and Zambia.  My purpose will not be to have you feel sorry for me, or our family.  My post today may help you embrace the hope and the help that can come by just a few people desiring to make a difference in another persons life. 

This young mother has Aids and her little baby is quite ill.

Zambia's Aids epidemic is at 27%.  If you are from a family of 4, someone you love would be taken from you because of Aids. Besides Aids, these people just like you and me get sick.  Malaria, typhoid fever, parasites, are rampant because their water is dirty!  Women have trouble delivering babies with no one to help them, their babies will die and if they live they are messed up inside.  Children fall and break bones with no one to set them.  The list of problems continues, the need remains the same, no medical help.  Today I want to share what medical facilities look like in the Western Provence in the villages.

This little boy and little girl are orphans.  They live at an orphanage.  A pastor who shares in this problem of orphans shared that he has a church numbering 600.  500 are children.  He does not know what to do.

 I will be honest and admit I did not get to see a hospital, though there is one in Mongu.  I do know that like all 3rd world countries it is one we would not want to be sent to.  The patients bring their own bedding and food, just for starters, there are no subsidies.  With this system you get bugs, germs and more problems.

Below is a 'clinic' built by one of the villages that a well through Hands of Hope had been placed in.  These people were so excited to show us this 'clinic'.  When a medical person comes to this clinic, people are examined, babies are born here and for these people it is a place of help.  You decide how you would react needing to come here.

The outside of the hut looks like every other hut.  Mud bricks, straw, sand is the floor, dirty sand.  However this hut is located near the street and the well.   Below is the inside of the 'clinic'.  I am not certain why there are clothes strewn around for as I 'peeked' into other huts as I could with each village visit,  this was not typical even in a 'home'. Perhaps it is clothing for someone who may need it.

Notice the openings.  Can you imagine this during the rainy season?

The  next photos show the new clinic built by Hands of Hope!  http://www.handsofhopeonline.org/ This clinic is also in a very remote area and will be accessible to those who could not get to Mongu! The sick have to walk 10+ miles to get to Mongu!  Can you place yourself with a sick child or being in labor, or having a broken limb walking to your doctor or clinic? This new clinic is such a gift of hope and encouragement to people who have none. 

I will be eager to see it in action when I go back next time.  The government will provide medical people to the villagers.  One very exciting component that sprang from this building, a 'market' opened across the street.  The 'market' consists of just straw kiosks but sellers will provide goods and villagers will have goods a bit closer to home.   

Below is a 'new' squatty potty.  I am so not a fan of these 'out houses'.  However, this too is a gift to both the individual needing it and the community to keep human waste away from their huts.  (Doors will be added!)

Both of these 'clinics' leave a lot to be desired by our standards.  However, they each represent hope and the prospect of health coming to their village. 

As I close this simple blog, I am humbled again by the hope that these simple buildings bring to these people.  I am grateful that my daughter Kara was not born into this country. Though she died because of her issues, she was cared for on a grand scale, given a fighting chance and an extended life.  She lived many years longer because of where she was born.   I do not believe for one moment that I am superior because of the blessing of being born in the US.  However, because of where I live and the knowledge I have of others needing help, I am responsible to help the poor, the widows and the orphans.

^"If anyone among you thinks he is religious, and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this one’s religion is useless.  Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself un-spotted from the world."  James, Chapter 1: 26-27 (The Bible)

Health and Fitness!

Instead of comparing our lot with that of those who are more fortunate than we are, we should compare it with the lot of the great majority of our fellow men. It then appears that we are among the privileged.   Helen Keller

As I blog this Zambian adventure, I am all over the place in deciding what to share and when to share it.  I placed the quote above at the beginning of this account because, if we look at life through only the eyes of our affluent and lush society we judge harshly what others deem a luxury.  Even as I type this last statement and look again at what I am about to post, I am sharing it because of the high standards our businesses are held to. 

Several members of my  family are in training mode as they prepare for a half marathon and a 15K. Following a conversation today at our family gathering I thought I would share what fitness options are like in Mongu. I have the privilege of traveling a great deal in my business, I have stayed at many hotels and work out rooms are an important part of choosing a hotel for many people.  They can be quite simple, or beautiful state of the art facilities.  (At least that is what I am told.)

Getting and being in shape is the focus of my friends and family planning to race.  Other friends just enjoy going to gym.  After Christmas, health club marketers here in the US will have 'enticing deals'  to help us overcome the gluttony most Americans succumb to over our holidays.  For the average Zambian there is no need for gyms.  However, here in Mongu we find a 'gym' as they attempt to keep up with countries that are more developed.

If you have been following my blogs you know that the women in Africa stay strong because of manual labor.  The young mom who uses the treadle pump several hours a day to water her garden has a 'stair master'.   The woman who will walk 5 miles several times a day to fetch water in a 5 gallon container for her family.  Her weights are this container, as she hoists 40 lbs of water onto her head and then walks home.   The woman who goes to market to purchase her masa in 25-50 lb bags that she balances on her head while she is carrying her child on her back has a workout too.  The weather is always warm with an average temperature year around of 80 degrees, so a sauna time is incorporated with her daily tasks, especially in the rainy season.  She keeps her legs, calves and thighs in shape because she carries her loads and walks through deep sand.   Cars are extreme luxuries so everyone walks or bikes.

My translator and guide, during my 'adventure' day showed me the sport facility in Mongu.  I did not snap a photo of it for we drove past it too fast. It was small but it was a point of pride to have this facility.

Our hotel the Dolphin Lodge marketed their gym on the only bill board for 100's of miles.  I filed that info away on our trip in thinking hmmm this is good.   Not because I had anticipated working out but knowing that having this facility meant we were not in a hut.  The sign below made our hotel  look promising.


As I shared in a different blog our hotel was simple.  We had spent 8+ hours reaching our destination seeing hut after hut, grass and/or mud, so :) to arrive at a building such as the Dolphin Lodge was a relief.  Discovering running water, a shower and toilet that flushed were all pluses.  It was several days before I actually walked around the hotel property.  3 doors down from my room was the 'conference center', the gym and the laundry room.  There had been activity there most of the week but our schedule was packed and our down time did not exist.  I basically ignored that end of the hall.  I am a very curious individual and finally 7 days into our trip I decided that I needed to know what was beyond the end of my hallway.  Get ready for the tour.

Below are photo's of the workout area.  I am a bit of a stranger to these machines though I do know what they are for. I cannot attest to how well they worked but I do know that guests used them during our stay. (You can double click to enlarge the photos.)

The area is small and compact but I am guessing one could get a nice workout using the equipment available.  Just a few steps to my right I discovered a few more amenities.  They had shower facilities!  Now as you continue to look at these photos know that as an American these facilities would be shut down.  However, in this part of Zambia a shower facility is rare! 

Men's locker room. 

This sign below is hard to read but critical to the understanding of how important this shower is!!  The spelling and verbiage are copied as written in the note.

Notice to All

IT HAS BEEN OBSERVED THAT SOME PEOPLE HAVE A TENDENCE TO LEAVE DIRT IN OUR SHOWER.  THEREFORE BE INFORMED THAT CLEANLINESS IS GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH.  DON’T LEAVE ANY FORM OF DIRT AFTER CATCHING A SHOWER.  PLEASE MAKE SURE YOU LEAVE IT AS CLEAN AS YOU FOUND IT.  YOUR CO-OPERATION WILL BE HIGHLY APPRECIATED.  DO NOT LEAVE MUCAS IN THE SHOWER.        BY MANAGERMENT

The inscription is printed above this photo.

This is the shower.  Is really, really bad.  Fortunately for those of us staying at the hotel our showers were clean!
                                                                                                  

This is one nasty shower!  (If you double click the photo you will get a larger picture).

Each day we had fresh sheets and one towel.  I did not think too much about this but next to the 'gym' was the laundry.  They washed our bedding on the premises and set them out to dry. House keeping here is very hard.

As I end this account today. I do not stand in judgement of what I showed to you.  I remain humbled that I am blessed to live where I do with blessings that abound on every level.